Lack of Sexual Desire
Do you and your partner disagree about how often to have sex? Do you have trouble remembering the last time you were sexually intimate? Are you frustrated that you always seem too busy, tired, or uninterested in having sex? Do you and your spouse/partner frequently feel hurt, anger, or frustrated about the lack of sex in your relationship? If so, you may be experiencing Inhibited Sexual Desire (ISD).
Inhibited sexual desire is one of the most common complaints of couples seeking sex therapy. ISD refers to the lack of sexual response or desire and a low rate of sexual activity. Both men and women are affected by inhibited sexual desire, which can become the source of emotional distress and relational conflict. This is especially true when one spouse is much less interested in sex than the other.
ISD affects millions of Americans and can be caused by a variety of differing underlying issues including:
Depression
Performance anxiety
Faulty religious beliefs about sex
Past sexual trauma (rape, abuse)
Low self-esteem/body image issues
Physical exhaustion
Fear of pregnancy
Fear of rejection
Other relationship issues
A spouse with ISD may continue to have sex with their partner, but often only out of marital duty. There is little satisfaction or pleasure in sex. The most extreme case of ISD is sexual aversion, which is characterized by a person finding sex repulsive or distasteful. Sexual aversion occurs most often in instances where there has been past sexual trauma.
If the above description is characteristic of what you are experiencing, please know that you are not alone. This is a very common sexual issue that can be helped with sex therapy.